Our children emulate all of our actions.
When we think about disclosure related to egg donation we normally think of the child resulting from the donation. Should the child’s parents disclose that they had difficulty conceiving and that she is in this world thanks to the great heart of a young woman she will never meet?
Most egg donors are young and although they know that someday they will have a family, they are not taking that into consideration. So many years later, when an egg donor does have her own children, should they know that she served as an egg donor while she was in college? After all, this means that her own children have older half-brothers and half-sisters whom they will never meet.
What about the egg donor’s future spouse? Is he/she entitled to know that his/her future children DO HAVE half-siblings?
My answer is: So what?
Yes, today’s technology allows for couples who would otherwise remain barren to conceive with the aid of an egg donor. So, new rules and new events have arisen in our society.
YES, all those individuals, the future spouse, the children who are the result of the egg donation and the children of the egg donor have the right to know that an egg donor is a wonderful person who understood the tremendous pain of a woman who cannot conceive. This egg donor took time away from her busy schedule as a student to attend multiple doctor’s visits and put aside the minor pain that the protocol injections dealt to her. And as a result, she received not only financial compensation but a tremendous satisfaction of knowing that thanks to her a family has been completed.
The key is how we present the information. The egg donor has a lot to be proud of, and the parents also have bragging rights. They overcame one of the most difficult obstacles that life can bring us and as a result, they have the baby they had yearned for. And most importantly, all these adults serve as great examples for their children.
We all talk about giving back… The egg donor actually did it!